The Baynhams

I have a friend who shall remain nameless. Well every year Monica, oops, I just told you who she is. Never mind, she doesn't deserve anonymity. Well, every year Monica has a bit of an obsession about how many Agapanthus flowers she has growing in her garden. This year there were a few emails simply with a number in the text, how many flower buds she could count on her flourishing plants. Each time I got a message from her I ran out to count my Agapanthus flower heads and just managed to have a few more than her. The competition was heating up. Every single flower counted. I wasn't about to lose this war. 

I watched Byron outside last weekend mowing the grass. Not that I would ever tell him how to do his job BUT he was being a bit haphazard around my glorious flowers. So gung-ho that he hit one stalk and snapped the poor thing off. My blood boiled. Were they in league with one another? Was Monica paying him to reduce my chances of winning? Had I just witnessed sabotage? I felt the blood pounding in my ears as I ran out to the garden and proceeded to batter Byron with the damaged flower. 

Luckily the kids managed to pull me away but not until Byron was covered in purple flower heads. My friendship with Monica is on shaky ground. After the Judge saw this photo I'm still not allowed within 500 meters of her house. The magistrate said that if I can behave myself for the next 3 months he might relax the terms of the barring order. I think I can manage that. It's this time next year that worries me. When she starts counting the flower heads budding on her beautiful plants again...